“You’re either an idiot or a serial killer.”

Writing is a business fraught with the potential danger of the FBI busting down your door. You’d be amazed how much obscure garbage the creative process can’t do without. Here are some of the (un)usual suspects, straight out of my search history:

“mackerel fishing in france”

“can trained dogs find dead bodies”

“how many hours is zhengzhou from qinghai”

“is there caution tape in china”

“where do camellias grow”

“define nitroglycerin”

“what happens if hamstrings are cut”

“what does oregano smell like”

“national mint julep day”

“how soon do babies die after the death of a mother during pregnancy”

“define loins”

“define fandango”

“why did susanoo leave heaven”

“most popular weekday for drinking”

“jex blackmore”

Some of these may sound illegal, or just like stupid questions, but let’s be honest: how many are you actually confident enough to write about? Better yet, what shady queries have you made in the name of the creative process?